by Sara Wagner, CFDM Faculty
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
I was asked if I could write a blog about awareness. It is rather humorous because I tend to be a fairly oblivious person most of the time as my spouse will attest. But tonight, there was awareness. Not the felt presence of God, but a real and growing awareness of His promise of purification to meet my growing awareness of how much I need that purification. I had a deepening of the understanding that to be the Beloved is to become aware and attuned to the promises of God… to realize they are not merely words on a page but cool, living water to a dry and thirsty soul. To be the Beloved is to be caught up in the promise… to be held by it and nurtured in it… allowed to soak in it… enabled to let it penetrate to a deeper place within. Becoming aware within one’s self of the promise, from my experience, takes time. I have noted that when I do seem to receive that deeper message… that deeper awareness of the message and what it promises, I look back and see that the message has been sent on many occasions, I just hadn’t been aware of it. I have also noticed that there tends to be a genuine physical sensation within me once I do become aware. Perhaps it is like a pregnant woman who suddenly starts to notice that the movement inside of her of the unborn baby (quickening) really is something moving in her that is other than herself. She didn’t “cause” it, it happened of its own accord. So it seems to be is the movement of the Spirit. I can not cause it, nor can I, in and of myself, become aware of it without the grace of God providing both the movement and the awareness of the movement of His Spirit.
It has been a rather hard season for me with lots of confusion and dryness and some very deep darkness. Tonight, however, God gave me the gift of this passage. He illuminated the phrase “… and purify us from ALL unrighteousness”. This promise seemed to first wash over me and then sink into the crevices of my soul…. Purify me from ALL unrighteousness?….. ALL unrighteousness!! This promise became alive within me…. ALL unrighteousness. This truth seemed to ebb and flow within me. It brought calm and hope…. ALL unrighteousness. How Blessed! I hope this blog will give you hope if you are also in a dry, dusty or dark season. Even if the promises of God seem far away right now, don’t lose hope…. all of a sudden a promise will sneak up on you and catch you by surprise like a rogue wave… for those promises are real and they are meant for you, the Beloved.
One thought on “Awareness”
Sara, I love how you have depicted these movements: “…first wash over me and then sink into the crevices of my soul…. became alive within me…. seemed to ebb and flow within me. ” What a beautiful picture of the Life God offers. Thank you for sharing from what you call a “rather hard season for me with lots of confusion and dryness and some very deep darkness” with such transparency and beauty, imparting Life to others.